A Heart's Release: Why 'Forgiving What You Can't Forget' by Lysa TerKeurst is Your November Companion for Healing

Hello, dear readers—it's Jessica here, your therapist at Restoration Counseling LLC, wrapping up this reflective November 2025 with a book that's become a treasured ally in my own journey and those of my clients. As we settle into the quiet gratitude of the season, fresh from our explorations of forgiving others and extending grace to ourselves, I'm thrilled to shine a light on Lysa TerKeurst's Forgiving What You Can't Forget: Discover How to Move On, Make Peace with Painful Memories, and Create a Life That's Beautiful Again. Published in 2020, this gem feels timeless—like a wise friend who meets you in the raw ache of betrayal or loss and gently guides you toward freedom. If my recent blogs on biblical forgiveness and self-forgiveness stirred something in you, this book is the perfect companion, offering practical, Scripture-soaked steps to walk that path without the weight of shame.

A Gentle Guide Through the Hard Places

Lysa TerKeurst doesn't sugarcoat the sting of deep hurts—drawing from her own story of profound betrayal, she validates the very real pain that makes forgiveness feel impossible. What I love most? She reframes forgiveness not as a one-and-done miracle or a forced amnesia, but as a daily choice to release bitterness for your own sake. Echoing the trauma-informed truths we've unpacked in my blogs, Lysa emphasizes boundaries as holy ground—protecting your heart while opening it to God's redemptive work. Her chapters weave through survival in the aftermath, navigating tangled emotions, grieving what was lost, and rebuilding a life marked by peace rather than resentment.

One standout section? The practical tools for processing pain, like journaling prompts rooted in Psalms and reflections on how unforgiveness quietly erodes our joy. It's here that the book shines as a bridge to self-forgiveness too—reminding us that extending mercy to others starts with receiving it from ourselves, much like the compassionate "parts" work in Internal Family Systems we've touched on. Lysa's voice is warm, vulnerable, and unflinchingly honest, blending psychological insights with spiritual depth to make the "long road" of healing feel doable and deeply hopeful. By the end, you're not just convinced forgiveness is possible; you're equipped to pursue it, one grace-filled step at a time.

Why This Book Belongs on Your Shelf (and in Your Sessions)

In my counseling room, I've recommended Forgiving What You Can't Forget to clients wrestling with the very themes of my recent posts—those raw moments when memories flood back, triggering doubt or self-doubt. It pairs beautifully: Use it alongside our discussion of biblical release (no reconciliation required) or as a mirror for self-compassion amid shame's whispers. Lysa's storytelling draws you in, her prayers ground you, and her truths liberate—proving that while we may not forget, we can indeed move forward into a "beautiful again."

If forgiveness feels like your November focus, grab this book—it's a five-star essential for anyone ready to trade chains for freedom.

Jessica@RestorationCounselingDSM.com, visit my website, www.restorationcounselingdsm.com or text me at (515) 518-0681 to get started.