Why do I keep going back!? – A Vicious Cycle
Today, porn addiction, or problematic pornography use, affects approximately 3% of the adult population. Up to 65% of young adult men and 10% of young women report watching pornography and participating in masturbation at least once a week. I have a suspicion that this number is likely much higher.
Some more staggering statistics include:
Every Second:
28,258 users are watching pornography on the internet.
$3,075.64 is being spent on pornography on the internet.
372 people are typing the word "adult" into a search engine.
Every Day:
37 pornographic videos are created in the United States.
2.5 billion emails containing porn are sent or received.
68 million search queries related to pornography- 25% of total searches- are generated.
116,000 queries related to child pornography are received.
How Online Pornography Affects Americans
About 200,000 Americans are classified as “porn addicts.”
40 million American people regularly visit porn sites.
35% of all internet downloads are related to pornography.
34% of internet users have experienced unwanted exposure to pornographic content through ads, pop up ads, misdirected links, or emails.
One-third of porn viewers are women.
We often wonder, how in the world has it gotten so bad? The answer is surprisingly simple: access. Twenty-five to thirty years ago individuals would have to work a lot harder at accessing pornographic materials, but since the invention of the internet and smart phones, individuals now have pornographic material at the touch of a finger. Talk about instant gratification!
The effects of pornography can be seen in our youth, individuals, and marriages and families. Children who are young enough to use a computer or smartphone have the ability to see pornographic material with just one error in wording in a search engine. The effect on youth is an increase in the odds of teenage pregnancy, a hinderance of sexual development, rise in the risk of depression, and the creation of distorted expectations which hinder healthy sexual development. The risks continue in the family and marriages. According to National Coalition for the Protection of Children & Families, 2010, 47% of families in the United States reported that pornography was a problem in their home. Pornography and chronic and problematic masturbation increase the marital infidelity rate by more than 300%. 40% of people identified as “sex addicts” lose their spouses, 58% suffer considerable financial loss, and about 33% lose their jobs. 68% of divorce cases involve one party meeting a new person over the internet while 56% involve one party having an “obsessive interest” in pornographic websites.
The use of pornography or chronic masturbation are treated as an addiction as much as the use of alcohol or illegal drugs, or food, or gambling. Individuals with this addictive behavior did not start out thinking that they would use it so compulsively. The were just looking for something to fill a relational or sexual need that was unmet, but it eventually became a habitual and compulsive habit that has now rewired their brain to believe that it can help them avoid uncomfortable feelings like loneliness, stress, anxiety, or depression.
With these shocking numbers and heartbreaking consequences, I often wonder why God created us to be such sexual beings, especially when we are often so plagued by shame in connection to sex. It is difficult at times to remember that sex was God’s idea. In Jay Stringer’s book, Unwanted, he walks through the six core life experiences that contribute to unwanted sexual behavior: deprivation, dissociation, unconscious arousal, futility, lust, and anger. All these things on their own are not enough to create damage but when these things are combined and linked together, it creates a hotbed for unwanted and unhealthy sexual behaviors. Like any other sin, God is waiting for you to bring this to Him. He is not ashamed of you; He is not condemning you. He knows your struggle and He knows your heart and He offers an invitation to you today to enter into relationships with Him and be loved abundantly.
As a clinical mental health counselor and addiction counselor, I see individuals with these issues along with attachment and traumatic experiences that have influenced unwanted behaviors. If this is something that you are struggling with, give us a call today and schedule an appointment with either myself or another provider and start your journey to freedom today!
